Please note: this is NOT a regular walking tour.

It’s an edgy, outrageous, uniquely-San Franciscan experience.

Have a few laughs with Clyde Always, the Bard of Bay City, storyteller extraordinaire, whose stage show has been featured at such beloved local venues as The Marsh Theater, the Lost Church and Café International.

You’ll be dazzled by several of Clyde’s own modern myths, legends, fables and fairytales. They feature witches & pirates, hoboes & hipster-devils... Make sure you bring your imagination.

In between these zany stories, your host will be pointing out various dives, murals, coffeehouses, landmarks, shops and stunning Victorian architecture—no shortage of Instagramable photo-ops, here.

Miles away from the rest of the tourists, you’ll get some insider knowledge of three of the City’s hippest neighborhoods—the Mission, the Castro and the Haight.

Looking for fun things to do and delicious things to eat? Clyde’s got the hot tips.

Be warned! Your host is a fast-talker and he may tell you a few phony “facts.” Take anything he says with a grain of salt.

If you’re offended by profanity, soap will be provided (but bring your own water).

Scared of heights? Rest easy—the route involves no hill climbing!

This stroll is guaranteed to entertain, enliven and uplift both visitors and locals alike.